You might be a little TOO Hooah if…

Your kids call the sandbox “NTC”.

  • Your wife has mermites in the China Cabinet.
  • Your older kids call the youngest one “Cherry”.
  • When your wife left you, you had a Change of Command.
  • Your wife carries a buttpack instead of a Gucci purse.
  • Your kids would rather get SIMNET than Nintendo 64.
  • When your family gets together, you call them “Slice Elements”.
  • You butter your toast with a bayonet.
  • If your kids get a wrong answer in school they immediately drop and knock out 20.
  • Your personal license plate says “At Ease”.
  • All of your kids’ names begin with “AR”.
  • Your grandmother won the Week of the Eagles.
  • Your POV has your name stenciled on the windshield.
  • Anyone using the TV remote control must dispatch it first.
  • Your kids are hand receipt holders.
  • Your kids practice Drill and Ceremony at recess.
  • Your dog’s name is “Ranger”.
  • Your kids pull night guard shifts by the mailbox.
  • Your wife has a better high and tight than your commander.
  • Your kids sound off with “Airborne” or “Air Assault” every time their left foot hits the ground.
  • Your wife won’t buy anything unless it has a National Stock Number.
  • Your kids have to wax and buff the floor before going to school.
  • When your dog died, he got a 21-gun salute at Arlington.
  • Your kids call their teachers “REMFs” and the other kids at school “legs.”
  • Your daughter’s dolls wear starched uniforms.
  • Your daughter complained that her new Barbie’s hair wasn’t within regulation and then cut it.
  • If your kids fail a test, they get a Letter of Reprimand and an Article 15.
  • Your kids salute their grandparents.
  • Your kids get an LES with their allowance.
  • All your meals at home are MREs.
  • Your kids painted their Big Wheels camouflage and stuck bumper numbers on them.
  • All your household possessions were issued by CIF.
  • Your kids get sent to the “big house” at Leavenworth if they’re disrespectful.
  • Your kids complain if they can’t have gym class five days a week.
  • Everyone does six pullups before sitting down at the dinner table.

By: Symatx’s Military Humor Page


One Response to “You might be a little TOO Hooah if…”

  1. Rosemary Zubowicz Says:

    I love this website! My son is in Iraq and I welcome any website that honors
    his choice to serve his country!
    PROUD ARMY MOM
    Rosemary Z.

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